It’s me and the husband’s fourth wedding anniversary and I thought I’d share some of my thoughts about marriage. Four years is far from being an expert but its enough time to formulate a few opinions on the subject. Right, lets go!
Marriage is hard. This much is true. Steve and I are very different people. We have completely different ways of expressing ourselves, how we approach problems, decisions and conversation. Being naturally different and having to cohabitate is a difficult task at times. So we work hard at our marriage. It helps to know that our goals, our end game is the same. We have always wanted the same things, we just have to work on the journey of getting there.
Support each other. Be the first one to tell the other person when you disagree with something but always remember to support your partner. These two ideas seem contradicting, how can you disagree with someone but support them at the same time? You support them by being honest. Steve and I are each other’s biggest supporter, champion, cheerleader, and most honest critic. I trust and value his opinion and we work better together.
Spend time with each other. Date night or day, or afternoon, or 5 minutes. Priorities change once you throw children into the mix. Its increasingly important to find some time to remember that you’re a couple. Try to find some alone time to remind you that you are a team and the foundation of your family is based on you two being strong and happy with one another. When we feel burnt out, we call grandma and head out for a quick bite to eat and if lucky, squeeze a movie in there too. We come back refreshed, happy, and relaxed. You wouldn’t believe how a little alone time can rejuvenate your relationship.
Remember why you are married. Fighting is inevitable but try to remember why you married the person in the first place. I try to stay positive in these situations. I think of how much I love Steve, how much he loves me, and how much we love our children. How he has a work ethic that rivals anyone; how everything he does, he does for his family. A quote I recently read that stuck with me: The grass isn’t greener on the other side. Its greenest where you water it. Build on what you already have, water your grass people.
Every marriage is different, find your groove and go with it. Its an adventure after all! And you get to go on this most wonderful adventure, with your best friend no less. How can life get any better than that? Enjoy it. 😉